Over the weekend, one of my beautiful, Senior for Caregivers, Yoga Participants lost her soul-mate of over 60 years.
It hit our class hard this week – there were tears and love being sent her way as we all felt her pain hanging in the room.
I can honestly say that I’ve never felt more inadequate in my life. As I taught the yoga class it became heavy on my heart that we needed to offer a loving kindness mediation. We ended the class with this, hoping to envelop her in our love and care, from a distance.
I wish I could describe to you the energy of the room. It was poignant and beautiful and heavy and sad all at the same time and I had the most wonderful sense of Peace, knowing that this is my work and that this is where I need to be.
Throughout the class, I kept a silent mantra “Use me, Show me, Guide me” as I lead these people through this grief somehow, some way.
Each of them has a loved one who shares this horrible, life altering disease (Alzheimers) and I know that they were all in her shoes for that hour at least. You could almost read the thought bubbles over their heads, sending love to her but also wondering “when will it be me? How much longer do I have with my loved one?” Like I said, poignant, heavy, and as real as it gets.
At the funeral, the priest spoke about the Love of a Lifetime and I was honoured to hear some of their story. Just think what a love like that can do. I sat back and watched 4 children, 7 grandchildren (4 with spouses) and several nieces and nephews honour this man. Every person who told a story of James told of a man who put his family above all else. We were surrounded by his love and his memory.
For me, the connection goes a bit deeper than that of a yoga teacher. My daughter’s love is this man’s grandson. It gives me hope and joy, knowing that he has such an example to follow. An example of a man who loved fully and who taught his children and their children to do the same. I know that my Emily is in good hands and for this I am grateful.
I aspire to leave such a legacy.